


Through the Dark

by iola17



Category: Schitt's Creek
Genre: Angst, Arguing, Explicit Sexual Content, Hand Jobs, M/M, Making Up, Pre-Engagement, Reconciliation Sex, Romance, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-14
Updated: 2019-10-14
Packaged: 2020-12-09 10:01:40
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,325
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20992967
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/iola17/pseuds/iola17
Summary: Written for the Frozen Over prompt: David/Patrick almost break-up and reconcile around Christmas.Following a nasty argument, David storms out into the cold winter night, leaving Patrick to ponder the repercussions if David leaves him and decide what to do next.





	Through the Dark

**Author's Note:**

  * In response to a prompt by Anonymous in the [SCFrozenOver](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/SCFrozenOver) collection. 

> **Prompt:**
> 
> Pre-engagement. David/Patrick almost break-up and reconcile around Christmas. Light or heavy angst - either is awesome
> 
> Chose to set this after the events of Rock On but before Patrick auditions for Cabaret, I feel like I've stretched the timeline a little but time seems fairly elastic in Schitt's Creek.

Patrick sighed heavily as he crossed his arms over his chest, looking across the room at his boyfriend.

“I can’t believe you’re so casual about this, David. Profits are falling, we need to do something or the store isn’t going to survive.”

David was sitting on the couch, leaning forward with his elbows on his knees, eyes fixed on Patrick. “I know but I just don’t think we need to worry yet. It will work out.”

Patrick shook his head, irritated. “No it won’t. Things don’t just sort themselves out. We need to take action.”

“It’s really not as bad as you’re making it seem. A couple of weeks of lower takings could be a fluke.” David’s hands twisted together, fingers playing with his signature silver rings as he frowned at Patrick across the room.

“And if it’s not? We’re losing money, David! Which you would know if you ever looked at the spreadsheets I put together every week.” Irritation itched Patrick’s skin as he thought about the _hours _he put into those numbers each week, laying them out clearly for David to see, only for David to cast a cursory eye over them before disappearing to reorganise the lip balms or whatever else had caught his attention.

Frustration flared in David’s eyes and he stood up from the couch. “Don’t talk to me like I don’t put as much into this as you. I look at the spreadsheets.”

“So you know what I’m talking about! Why won’t you accept we need to do something?”

“Because businesses go through rough patches! Things will pick up and we don’t need to change our whole business model for a couple of bad weeks!” David said, the crease between his eyes becoming more pronounced.

“I’m not saying change _everything_!” Patrick protested. “But changing s_omething_ could help.”

“But it’s nothing to do with the store! Have you looked outside? People are struggling to get to us through the snow!”

Patrick rolled his eyes. “That’s your solution? Wait until spring? Really proactive, David. This is why the business is failing!”

“The business isn’t failing!” David’s voice was shrill, stress lacing through the syllables as Patrick put voice to one of his worst fears.

“You can’t keep burying your head in the sand!” Patrick said, and uncrossed his arms to rub at his forehead in an attempt to soothe away the burgeoning headache.

David shook his head. “People accuse _me_ of being dramatic,” he muttered under his breath and heat flooded Patrick’s brain.

“Don’t call me dramatic!” Patrick’s words were sharp, loud in the room.

“Then don’t call me complacent!” David waved his hands around the way he did when he found something to be unreasonable but instead of finding it endearing as he usually did, another of David’s unique personality traits, Patrick’s teeth clenched at the idea that David thought _he _was the one being difficult here.

“Oh no. No one could really accuse you of being laid back, could they David? Everything has to be laid out just how you want. Maybe if we moved some of our backroom items into the front, we wouldn’t be losing money!” Patrick threw out.

“Oh God, this again. It ruins the aesthetic!” David scowled at him, face scrunched in disapproval that, even annoyed at David as he was, stabbed at Patrick’s gut. But he needed to make his point.

“There will be _no _aesthetic if we can’t turn this around and increase profits!” Patrick was gesturing himself by then, arms spreading. He couldn’t help it.

“So that’s all that matters to you? The store making money?” David spat out and Patrick reeled back in disbelief.

“I think it’s fairly important for a business, yeah.” What didn’t David understand about this?

“Money, profits, it’s all I’ve heard about for two fucking hours. Take a breath, will you?” David’s arms crossed defensively over his chest.

“You want me to take a breath do you, David? You want me to step back and watch what we’ve built fold?” Patrick asked, eyebrows raised.

“No, that’s not what I... You’re overreacting.” David winced as soon as he said it but it didn’t matter. Red mist clouded into Patrick’s head and his breath was coming faster, getting faster and shallower.

“Or do you mean you want to take a breath from us, David?” Patrick didn’t recognise the words flowing from his mouth, couldn’t halt them even as a distant voice in the back of his mind shouted at him to s_top_. “It sure seems like that’s what you want.”

“No, of course not. Don’t be ridiculous. I never-”

Patrick was _ridiculous?_

“The way you pushed me into going out with Ken, was that your way of telling me you’d had enough of this?” Patrick shook as he glared across at David, heartbeat thundering in his ears. Something inside him was screaming at him but he ignored it in favour of sneering over at his boyfriend, “Trying to palm me off on someone else so you can find someone less ‘ridiculous.’”

Colour flooded David’s face, old grievances bubbling up between them and tempers catching fire.

“Like you didn’t as good as tell me you’d been eying up other men! You told me you were jealous of me for kissing Ted. What was I supposed to think? For all I knew someone like _Ken_ could be just the excuse you were looking for,” David said, lip curling in disgust. “You took his fucking number in front of me.”

“He just gave it to me! I was surprised!” Patrick shouted. How the hell do you refuse someone’s number when they’re pushing it into your hand? And what exactly was David accusing him of here?

“You kept it,” David said, a spiteful twist to his features. “Did you wish it was _his_ hand on your ass, sliding his number into your back pocket?”

Patrick’s jaw clenched. No. The date was David’s idea, he didn’t get to accuse Patrick of wanting to cheat. Of course Patrick recognised other men as attractive, he wasn’t blind (and yes, Ted looked hot at the housewarming party) but that didn’t mean he would want anything to happen with those men.

“I didn’t want him to touch me! I wouldn’t have used the number- you basically dialled it for me. Is our relationship that _boring _for you?”

David tried to interject but Patrick pushed on, voice rising over David’s. “You wanted us to climb trees to prove we’re exciting, do you want us to fuck other people too? Would that make me less boring to you, David?”

A muscle clenched in David’s jaw as he ground out, “You’re twisting it. And I never said you were boring. I told you the tree climbing thing was Alexis getting in my head.”

“But there must have been something in your mind for you to take that stupid quiz! Maybe I’m not exciting enough for David Rose.”

Insecurities Patrick didn’t realise were there were falling from his lips. He’d heard enough and read enough about David’s past to know the kind of people he used to date. A business major from a small town would never have been interesting enough to catch David Rose’s eye back then.

David pinched the bridge of his nose and closed his eyes. “I took the quiz because I was bored. _Not _because you’re boring. But you can’t deny it was fun to be a little spontaneous.”

“Spontaneous,” Patrick repeated scornfully, unimpressed. For all they knew that little foray into spontaneity had contributed to their falling profits. Customer loyalty mattered.

David waved his hand around as his eyes opened and his voice rose. “Yes, spontaneous. You know, like people are when they’re young and not so fucking serious all the time!”

“You think I’m too serious to have fun?” Patrick’s chest felt tight, so filled with molten rage it was hard to breathe.

“I didn’t say you couldn’t have fun! Fucking hell. I’m saying it wouldn’t kill you to ease up a little sometimes. I mean, God forbid you touch me in the store. The fucking walls might collapse in on us.”

Patrick scoffed. “You’re pissed I won’t fall to my knees and suck you off on the shop floor? You want me to fuck you on the counter?”

“It’s not about sex! I don’t want to get off in the middle of the working day, but there’s nothing wrong with kissing my boyfriend now and then. When there’s no one around, why can’t we sneak into the back for a few minutes like we used to?” David paced around the floor, glaring at Patrick as he flung the words at him.

“Because we’re trying to be professional!” Patrick shouted, blood pressure rocketing. “What don’t you understand? It isn’t difficult, David!”

David ran his hands through his hair, messing up his perfectly coiffed style and let out an annoyed grunt.

“Well, I’m so sorry our relationship is such an inconvenience to you but I can’t put everything in boxes like you do. I can’t ignore my feelings for you when we’re at work,” David said, scowling.

“I don’t ignore anything! I just keep my hands to myself so I can focus on work.”

David scoffed. “So when you said we could just go back to being co-workers and that would be fine with you, that wasn’t you just ignoring how you felt about me?”

Patrick racked his brain. When had he _ever_-? Oh.

“After the barbecue? That was _ages _ago. It wasn’t _fine _with me; I was trying to do what you wanted after you took forever to talk to me!”

David flushed. “I apologised for that.”

With Tina Turner as a back up singer. It’s one of Patrick’s favourite memories of David, opening himself up and offering his soul for Patrick’s perusal.

Patrick clamped down on the memory, stopping it before it had a chance to spread its warmth throughout Patrick’s chest. Stopping it before it could become tainted forever after by the memory of _this _night instead.

“I said it because I thought you just wanted to be co-workers for the sake of the business. Because whatever is going on with us, it makes sense to be able to work together for the store!” Patrick’s skin was prickling, adrenaline pouring through his system.

“Stop fucking treating me like I don’t understand my own store.” David’s fists were clenched at his side and Patrick could see him trembling.

“It’s _our _store! And it feels like I’m the only one taking it seriously. You’re the one acting like I should just follow whatever you say.”

“No, I’m not!” David said loudly and Patrick raised his voice further to make himself heard over his boyfriend’s protestations.

“As you’re this big business oracle. ‘Things will pick up, it will all sort itself out, we should be fucking in the stockroom constantly.’”

“Stop twisting my words!” David shouted, shaking his head in fervent denial of Patrick’s words.

“We don’t need to listen to me, do we David? I’ve never owned a business before so we should ignore everything I’m saying.”

“You’re making this into way too big of a deal!” David yelled, but Patrick was on a roll.

“You’ve had all these great galleries and on top of that you’re the first guy to suck my cock so of course I should be fawning all over you and your words of wisdom. Ignore my degree, I don’t know what I’m talking about.”

David turned away, storming towards the door.

“I can’t talk to you. I’ve had enough of this. I need to think and I need to be away from you right now.”

“Fine. Fucking go. I don’t want to be near you,” Patrick shouted at David’s retreating back.

The door slammed behind David so hard the clock shuddered on the wall and Patrick let out a frustrated, wordless scream, the sound tearing at his throat.

Patrick ground his teeth as he stomped across the kitchen. His hands shook as he yanked the on the cupboard handle, wrenching it open before reaching up to seize his favourite mug. He pulled it from the shelf and slammed the door closed with such force that it bounced open again and he huffed in annoyance, shoving it closed again.

He was gripping the cup so tightly his fingers hurt and he span round, banging it down on the counter.

The handle snapped off in his hand and he raised his fist, staring at the broken off piece of pottery clutched within it for a moment before flinging it across the room.

“FUCK!” Patrick exploded and stormed out of the kitchen, abandoning his attempt at a calming cup of tea to throw himself onto the couch.

He leaned back on the seat, hands covering his face and pressed the heels of his palms into his eyes, so hard he saw pinpricks of light dance across his eyelids.

He exhaled noisily through his teeth, frustrated anger still thundering through his blood.

What the fuck?

Why wouldn’t David just listen to him? Patrick knew what he was talking about. The store’s takings had been dropping week by week and if it continued it could be a disaster. Far better to take steps to adapt themselves now than find themselves out of business in the new year.

Patrick sighed, mulling over the situation. It didn’t even have to be anything major. But whatever Patrick had suggested, whether it was another Open Mic, a Christmas grotto for children, or a sales promotion, David had shot all of Patrick’s suggestions down. (He’d been especially vocal about his opposition to the idea of putting lurid sales signs all over the store.)

Patrick slumped down on the sofa as he felt the adrenaline starting to drain from his muscles. They’d had arguments before but nothing like the verbal missiles they’d just thrown at each other.

Patrick didn’t even know how the discussion had gotten so out of control, how it had transformed into that hideous row. Submerged problems had risen, unbidden, to the surface, issues Patrick didn’t even realise had been bothering him.

His insecurities over David’s motives when he pushed him towards Ken, his worries that he wasn’t exciting enough, that David would realise it and decide he wasn’t worth it, all of it had come spilling out of his mouth.

Too wound up to take it all in at the time, alone in the silence he had time to digest David’s words, allowed himself to look at his boyfriend’s complaints. He’d had no idea that his initial teasing reaction to receiving Ken’s number had rubbed David the wrong way (although maybe he should have, knowing David’s track record), or that David was so frustrated at Patrick’s determination not to be overly affectionate in the store.

Patrick shook his head, inhaling deeply. His professional demeanour towards David during business hours was a constant, deliberate effort. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to touch David- he was worried he wouldn’t be able to stop and someone would rob them blind while he and David were distracted with each other in the stockroom.

Patrick sat there for a long time, the argument echoing in his head and as the last of the fury faded from his whirring mind he cringed thinking back over some of the things he’d said. The only defence he could come up with was that no one could think straight when they were angry and David always was able to incite a strong emotional response in him.

They still needed to come up with a plan for the store and the other stuff… well, they’d need to talk about that too.

They’d have a lot of talking to do when David came back. Patrick glanced at the clock.

It must have been nearly an hour since David had stormed out. He wouldn’t be much longer.

Then it hit Patrick like a blow to the stomach, the grim thought coalescing into an icy stone in his gut.

He’d told David to go. What if he didn’t come back?

Patrick’s breath caught. What if David thought he’d meant forever?

His skin prickled and his stomach heaved at the idea. He couldn’t be without David.

It had almost destroyed Patrick the last time David had almost slipped through his fingers and he’d sworn to himself as David shimmied across the store floor to the strains of Tina Turner that he wouldn’t let David go easily ever again. Patrick couldn’t bear the idea that he might have just thrown David away.

David was his boyfriend (_fuck, David would still want to be his boyfriend, right?_) He loved David more than anything. Surely, Patrick hadn’t been so stupid as to destroy the most precious thing in his life?

He scrambled off the couch, stumbling to the bathroom as his stomach revolted. He barely made it to the toilet before bringing up the remnants of the dinner they’d eaten at the café before everything went so wrong.

_“I don’t want to be near you.”_

Patrick heaved, but nothing but burning stomach acid rose in his throat.

Had that blatant lie really come out of his mouth? He wanted to be near David always and, suddenly terrified he’d never be as close to David as he wanted again, he was desperate for it, his body aching from being so far from the man he loved. He needed David here. They needed to talk about this.

_“You want us to fuck other people?”_

No.

Jesus, no. Patrick couldn’t believe he’d said that.

He coughed into the toilet bowl, mind swimming with devastating images of David kissing other people, touching them the way he touched Patrick, making them feel as good as he made Patrick feel.

David fucking someone else, face slack with the pleasure he was getting from another person’s body. Another person who wasn’t Patrick.

Patrick couldn’t do it. He couldn’t stand by as someone else took his place in David’s heart and his bed.

Patrick had meant it when he said he didn’t want Ken to touch him. He loved David, wanted sex with David and the idea that he’d even hinted that David sleep with another person felt like poison in his veins.

_“I’m so sorry our relationship is such an inconvenience.”_

He vomited again, the last of his dinner emptying out of his stomach as anxiety spiked in his brain.

Was that how he’d made David feel? So many people in David’s life had treated him like an afterthought.

Patrick felt lower than them all. He’d let David fall in love with him before revealing himself as yet another person unworthy of him. Someone willing to use his words to injure David.

Their relationship was the most important thing in Patrick’s life. Patrick _adored _David. Even if the store didn’t survive, if it imploded around them, Patrick wanted David. David made him feel right.

_I’ve had enough of this. I need to think and I need to be away from you._

Was that… Was David going to break up with him?

Patrick shivered as he curled up on the bathroom floor, stomach empty.

‘I need to think’- that wasn’t something you said when you were sure about a relationship. David was thinking about _them_, considering if he wanted to be with Patrick.

Groaning, Patrick closed his eyes as nausea welled up again, taking deep breaths until he was sure he wasn’t going to be sick again.

Dragging himself to his feet, he stumbled back into the living room, stomach twisting when he spotted the mug handle lying on the rug by the fireplace.

David had given him that mug before they were even together. Quickly catching on to how much Patrick liked tea, David had presented it to him one morning with a tongue-in cheek smile. A simple rose design above the name of their store, one of the first in their new line.

Patrick, in the throes of his blossoming crush on the man in front of him, had treasured it instantly. It was such a small thing, but it was the first gift David had given him and now he’d broken it.

Stifling a sob, he picked up the handle carefully, avoiding the sharp edges and carried it back to the kitchen, barely able to keep upright on his watery legs.

The rest of the cup was still by the kettle where he’d slammed it down and he inspected it closely, terrified to find more damage. A hairline crack snaked up from the base of the mug and the rim was chipped, the jagged shard lying beside the rest of the mug.

Fuck.

Patrick added the handle to the collection of ceramic on the countertop and slumped against the kitchen unit before crumpling to the floor, distraught. Tears stabbed at his eyes.

The mug would never be the same. And Patrick would never get a first present from the man he loved again.

Patrick blinked and he looked around the apartment, feeling as if he was seeing it for the first time. He’d chosen this place with the intention of David spending time with him here. Somewhere they could be alone together for the quality time they needed.

While sitting in a darkened car in the motel parking lot with his hand shoved down David’s pants as David sucked bruises onto his collarbone was thrilling (and a little terrifying), there were things to be said for a sex in a bed with Ray more than one unlockable door away. The decision to look for a place of his own had been a simple one, many of the reasons centring around his beloved boyfriend.

It had been awkward when David had thought Patrick had meant them to move in together but Patrick hadn’t been quite ready for that. He kicked himself for not jumping at the chance to live with David when he had the chance. David might never give him another opportunity now.

Suddenly faced with an apartment that might never have David Rose in it for a significant amount of time again, the appeal of his own place was quickly losing its lustre.

He needed to talk to David before David decided he’d had enough once and for all. They could fix this.

He scrabbled in his pocket, pulling his phone out with shaking hands. It took four attempts to unlock the screen with his sweating fingertips.

He fumbled to pull up David’s contact details and pressed the call icon, pressing the phone to his ear as he breathlessly waited for the ringing tone.

David’s cell rang both in his ear and on the coffee table in the sitting room, lighting up and vibrating across the surface where David had left it before the argument had begun.

Shit.

Patrick hung up and strode over, picking up David’s phone as the screen went dark. He pressed the home button and swallowed as he the lock screen lit up and he saw a picture of himself, sitting on the couch and cradling his guitar as he smiled at the photographer, devotion shining from his eyes.

Overlying his own smitten face was the notification:

**1 missed call (9.03pm)**

**Patrick ** **😍**

Patrick stared at the screen until it went dark once more and thought desperately about what to do next.

He could wait for David to come back, but what if he didn’t? And what if the delay further cemented any belief David had that Patrick didn’t want him?

He could go looking for him, but he didn’t know where to start and didn’t want to waste time wandering around.

Patrick bit his lip, thinking.

Stevie. David would go to Stevie.

Patrick pushed David’s phone into his pocket, wanting to keep it close in case David phoned his own number, unsure where he’d left his cell, before calling Stevie from his own phone.

It rang and Patrick drummed the fingers of his free hand on his thigh, tapping David’s phone in his pocket through his jeans.

Stevie didn’t answer.

When her voicemail clicked on, Patrick waited impatiently for his cue to speak. Finally, the phone beeped.

“Stevie, it’s Patrick. If you’re with David, please call me back, or get him to call me back. I really need to talk to him, so if he’s with you, please tell him. Or ask him to come back and we can talk about everything. I really need to see him, Stevie. Just… please. If you hear from him, let me know.”

He hung up, unsure of what else to say.

Alexis.

Unlike Stevie, Alexis picked up on the second ring.

“Hi button! How’s it going?” Her sunny voice came through the line and Patrick deflated. Clearly David hadn’t spoken to her if she was so happy to hear from him.

“Hi, Alexis. Have you seen David?”

“Um, no. He said he was staying with you tonight,” she said. “Is he coming back here? Ugh. Ted is away and I just pushed the beds together!”

“No. He… we… he left. If he shows up, please could you call me?” Patrick said, wincing at the desperate tone in his voice.

“Um, I don’t want to be obvious, Patrick, but why don’t you call him?” There was a shuffling sound in the background, the noise of a drawer scraping open as Alexis clattered about the motel room.

“I tried that. He left his phone.”

“He _left _his phone?” The shuffling noises stopped. “Oh my God, is everything alright?”

Patrick inhaled deeply, chest aching at the concern tinting her tone.

“I don’t think so,” he said, quietly. “We had a fight. I think I messed up.”

Alexis clucked sympathetically. “I’m sure it wasn’t as bad as you think. David’s had plenty of people screw him over, nothing you could do would even be on the scale.”

“I don’t want to be just the best of a bad bunch for him, Alexis!” Patrick said, his voice cracking. He didn’t want to be chosen by default; he wanted David to pick him because they loved each other and had a good relationship.

Patrick turned on the spot, running his free hand through his hair and froze when he spotted David’s jacket draped over the foot of the bed.

A moment later, Patrick rushed over to the jacket, hand diving into the pocket, emerging with David’s wallet and key chain.

David had stormed out into the December night with only a thin sweater to keep him warm. He didn’t have his phone, he didn’t have any money, he didn’t have his keys so he couldn’t even take refuge in the store. He clearly wasn’t at the motel as Alexis hadn’t seen him so where could he be?

Patrick swallowed.

“Patrick? Are you there?” Alexis asked in his ear and Patrick made a decision. He stuffed David’s wallet and keys back into the pocket and snatched up the jacket, before turning to the door.

“Look, I need to go and find him, Alexis. If he comes to the motel or contacts you, please let him know I’m looking for him. I really want to talk to him.”

He said goodbye to Alexis and rushed out of the apartment, barely remembering to lock the door behind him.

Outside, the snow was still falling lightly, and Patrick’s footsteps crunched as he ran over the grass, hurrying towards his car. He’d forgotten his own jacket and goose bumps rose on his exposed forearms as the chilly wind blew over his skin.

He didn’t pause to unroll his sleeves and unlocked the car, dropping David’s jacket into the passenger seat before rounding the hood and climbing into the driver’s seat.

The car had only been parked up for a couple of hours but already crystals of ice were forming on the snow speckled windshield and Patrick’s stomach swooped at the idea of David walking around in the freezing cold weather. He turned the wipers on to clear the window and threw the car into gear, head spinning as he considered where to go first.

He made his way slowly through the dark streets of Schitt’s Creek, eyes scanning the sidewalks, illuminated by sporadic streetlights. The roads were deserted. The occasional pedestrian struggled along, wrapped in thick winter coats, one walking a miserable looking Labrador through the icy puddles.

No David.

Patrick drove by the store, just to check. He already knew the David had no way in, having left his keys in his jacket and sure enough the store was in darkness. No shivering figure huddled in the doorway and Patrick chewed on his lower lip as he turned the corner, passing the café and crawling along as he peered into darkened alleyways.

Stevie’s place was just down the street and Patrick pulled over, jumping out and rushing up the pathway without bothering to lock the car.

Stevie’s car wasn’t parked outside but Patrick still leaned on the buzzer to her apartment, pressing for long seconds before drawing his thumb back. His heart thumped in his chest as he shivered, waiting for a response. After a moment he tried again, breathing shakily as he heard the dull buzzer sound.

Nothing. He stepped back, glancing up at the windows, counting along until he found what he thought was Stevie’s home.

There were no lights on and Patrick exhaled as he stumbled back down the path. He yanked his phone out of his pocket, swiping the screen to unlock it with his passcode after his cold thumbprint failed for the third time.

No messages.

He threw himself back into the car, desperation flaring as he pulled out again without taking the time to check if anything else was passing along the deserted street.

The motel was a five minute drive away but it took nearly twenty with the icy patches impeding his progress and with him stopping every few feet to stare into pitch black side streets.

He gave a brief thought to how suspicious this looked and really hoped no one called the cops. A night in jail was the last thing he needed.

Where was David? Wandering the cold streets alone in the dark, he could be easy prey for some lunatic with a knife. Patrick’s lungs struggled to take in enough air as his whirling imagination insisted on conjuring up pictures of David, alone and bleeding by the side of the dark road.

Patrick became aware that his cheeks were wet and swiped at his face, wiping the tears away and blinking to clear his blurred vision.

No, he told himself, there were no knife-wielding maniacs in Schitt’s Creek. David would be safe. Unless he contracted pneumonia from the cold because his inconsiderate boyfriend had let him walk out into the winter night without his jacket.

He just had to find David. Find David and get him somewhere warm where they could talk, sort everything out.

He needed to find his boyfriend before David decided he didn’t want to be Patrick’s boyfriend anymore.

He pulled into the motel parking lot and jumped out. The office was closer than David and Alexis’ room so he burst through that door first, eyes shooting to the counter where he expected to see Stevie, slouched behind the computer screen.

She wasn’t there. Instead, Johnny looked up in alarm, eyebrows disappearing into his hairline as he took in Patrick standing in the doorway, face red from the cold and snow dotting his shoulders.

“Patrick,” Johnny said. “Is everything okay?” His eyes searched behind Patrick before returning to Patrick’s face, worry shining out of those dark eyes. “Is David okay?”

“He’s not here?” Patrick said, the words high and breathy with stress.

Johnny shook his head. “No. No he’s not. Patrick, what’s going on? What’s happened?”

He rounded the desk, approaching Patrick as one would a skittish animal. “Sit down,” he said, pointing to the couch, his gesturing hands reminding Patrick so much of David’s that it hurt his heart.

“No. I… I can’t stay. I need to find David.”

“Settle down, why don’t you tell me what this is about?” David’s father moved in front of Patrick, a hand coming out to rest on Patrick’s arm. “You’re freezing, come in and warm up.”

Mr. Rose looked sideways at the coffee machine. “The coffee is… well it’s terrible but it’ll warm you up.”

Patrick shook his head, stepping back. He didn’t deserve David’s family being kind to him. If Johnny knew the things Patrick had said to his son that night…

“No. I really need to go. If… if David turns up can you please tell him I’m looking for him?”

Johnny looked at Patrick’s watery eyes, gaze skimming his tear-stained cheeks and seemed to understand. He nodded slowly.

“I’ll tell him. I want to be clear, if he doesn’t want me to tell you where he is, I won’t but I can tell him you’re looking.”

Patrick exhaled. “That’s fair. Thank you, Mr. Rose.”

“Patrick?” Johnny called him back just as Patrick was stepping out the door. “I hope you kids work out whatever is going on. You’re good for each other.”

“I hope so, too.”

_I wasn’t good for him tonight._

He ran along the walkway towards David and Alexis’ room, narrowly avoiding hitting the ice machine with his hip as he flew past.

Alexis opened the door before he even reached the room. “I thought that was your car.”

Patrick’s breath rushed out of his mouth. “David?” he asked, eagerly. “You’ve heard from him?”

“No, sorry sweetie,” she said and Patrick felt his face fall. “But,” she said, raising her finger. “I did hear from Twyla.” She smiled, apparently proud of this information.

“Twyla?” Patrick asked, confused. David liked Twyla but Patrick wouldn’t have said they were close friends. “He’s with Twyla?”

“No,” Alexis said and Patrick’s brow furrowed as his confusion increased. “Twyla is with Stevie.”

“…Okay.”

“Yeah. Apparently, there’s this big messy situation with Twyla’s brother’s friend and he like, majorly led her on. So when he stopped texting, Twyla was all weepy and sad and Stevie had this idea that she and David used to do which is to go to, like, a dive bar and look for randoms to hook up with.”

Alexis’ words swirled around Patrick’s head and he struggled not to tell her to get to the point. With David off making potentially devastating decisions about their relationship and Patrick’s own words about David wanting them to sleep with other people still in his head, Patrick didn’t want to think about David meeting up with strangers for sex, even if it was in the past. The threat of it becoming a possibility again for David in the future following their fight made him sick to his stomach.

“Stevie has this whole thing going with that cute motel reviewer but she was going to be like, wingwoman and make sure if Twyla ended up with someone, they weren’t a straight-up psycho.”

“What does this have to do with David?” Patrick interrupted.

“I’m getting to that. Twyla had already abandoned getting laid for getting wasted when she called me because there were zero do-able options there but she was still pretty clear that David wasn’t there. So at least you can cross her and Stevie off your list!” She finished smiling at Patrick like it was great that they still had no clue what had happened to David.

Patrick gritted his teeth. No news then. His heart was heavy in his chest as he thanked Alexis and trudged back to the car, barely feeling the chill anymore as he pulled open the door and slumped into the driver’s seat.

He rested his head on the steering wheel, not even trying to check the tears leaking from the corners of his eyes. Where _was _David?

He dragged David’s phone from his pocket.

Lighting the screen again he stared at his own grinning face, contented and blissfully in love and despised himself for tearing it all down in one stupid night.

There was still the missed call from him on the notifications, as well as two from Stevie, one from Alexis (hadn’t Patrick told her he had David’s phone?) and one from David’s father, timed just after Patrick’s visit to him.

He turned to his own phone and unlocked it. David was his background, of course. A candid photo of him leaning against the counter in the store on Open Mic Night, fierce flames across his chest and his beautiful face open and happy in the soft lights.

No missed calls, no texts. Stevie must have got his voicemail if she’d called David but, nothing if not loyal, she was clearly ignoring Patrick until she heard the story from David’s mouth.

The only notification on his home screen was an email alert. Someone from college had forwarded him a link to an upcoming small business seminar and Patrick brushed the screen to remove the notification. There were more important things to worry about.

He wasn’t sure how long he sat in the cold car, drained and heartsore but when he looked up again the office lights had been turned out and the motel was in darkness.

His hands were frozen and his body was trembling with the cold when he turned the key in the ignition once more.

The display illuminated. 11.52pm. The blinking icon on the dashboard also told him he’d need gas fairly soon.

Miserable, he pulled out of the car park. The snow was heavier now, sticking on the roads so Patrick navigated the icy streets at a pace no faster than walking.

He crawled through the silent streets, back to his apartment, still on the lookout for a shadowy figure but with no luck. He only hoped David had got somewhere safe.

He assumed he was at Stevie’s; Patrick knew Stevie had told David where her emergency key was for the times they had come home after nights out and she was too drunk to remember what she’d done with hers.

As long as David was safe and warm, Patrick could talk to him tomorrow.

He pulled up in front of his dark building and got out of the car, picking up David’s jacket as he stepped out onto the road. He didn’t want to leave it in the car; it had David’s wallet in it and anyway, it should be warm for him when he put it back on, not frozen solid from being in the car overnight.

Patrick might have been careless with their relationship tonight but he could look after David’s things for him. Maybe if he showed David he was capable in this one respect, David would give him another chance. Maybe he would ignore that Patrick had basically called him an irresponsible store owner with no business sense, always greedy for Patrick’s attention and affection at work while simultaneously finding him so boring that David wanted them to explore other people sexually. Thinking back, those last two things weren’t even compatible with each other but it had made complete sense to Patrick at the time.

He locked the car and made his way up to the apartment building, sighing as the warm air hit him inside the entrance hall and he immediately felt the chill leaving his fingers.

He doubted he’d sleep at all that night and would need to be up and out early to continue looking for David. Maybe he could give David the Christmas present Patrick had chosen for him early to show David that he was valued. Patrick had sent off for some of that expensive face cream from Milan and a tasting box of gourmet cheeses from around the world. He’d give David the booking details for the romantic getaway he’d planned for between Christmas and New Year to a spa hotel as well with its extensive list of treatments to choose from, even if David wouldn’t want Patrick to go with him now.

David would love the hotel and the tasting evening at the winery nearby; Patrick had been mostly excited to be with David, seeing his beautiful face when he saw the log fire in the foyer and the view of the mountains from the windows. He’d looked forward to spending time with his boyfriend, relaxing together and making love on the king-sized mattress, wrapped in each other’s arms and surrounded by the luxurious furnishings David deserved.

When Patrick stepped out of the elevator on his floor, he halted in his tracks, catching his breath.

There.

David sat slumped against Patrick’s door, head tilted back and eyes closed. His face was pale and blotchy, tear marks on his cheeks and his lips were chapped from the cold air and where he’d been chewing on them. There were bags under his eyes and his hair was all over the place.

He was still the most gorgeous thing Patrick had ever seen; even as his chest tightened in fearful anticipation of David saying the words he’d been dreading.

He took a step forward, the sound muffled on the carpet but David’s eyes opened at the muted noise and his head swivelled round to look at Patrick.

Oh.

David’s eyes were bloodshot, weary and so, so sad.

Patrick had done that. Patrick had put that look on David’s face.

Until the day he died, he’d remember the eviscerating agony that almost brought him to his knees at the naked anguish in David’s face.

They stood for a moment, staring at each other.

“Hi,” David said quietly and the frozen tableau broke. Patrick darted down the hallway, falling to his knees at David’s side.

“You’re here. You’re here.” Patrick’s hands fluttered over David’s body, wanting to touch, to check but not daring to make contact in case he melted away, the product of a strained and desperate psyche.

David blinked at him but made no move to reach out. “I... Yes.”

Patrick’s fingers brushed David’s sleeve and a half-sob burst from his lips when David didn’t dissipate like a mirage.

“You came back.” Patrick stroked along David’s arms, tentatively brushing the back of his hand when he reached the end of his sleeve, marvelling at the soft, warm skin against his fingertips. “You could have gone inside; you must be uncomfortable on the floor.” David shouldn’t be crouching in a chilly corridor; he should be cosy and comfortable in Patrick’s apartment.

David shook his head. “I left my keys.” Oh. Of course he did. Patrick glanced at David’s jacket where he’d dropped it on the ground beside him and felt like an idiot.

David continued, “It doesn’t matter, I wouldn’t have used them. I wasn’t sure I’d be... welcome.”

Patrick’s heart shrivelled.

_Fucking go, _he’d barked at this man, the love of his life, just hours ago. _Stay, _his mind chanted now. _Stay with me, stay forever._

“You’re always welcome,” he whispered, voice soft. His eyes stared into David’s, desperate for David to see it, to see the truth in his eyes. “Always, David. I love you.”

David shifted on the floor and Patrick lost contact with his hand, the absence sending a chill up his arm. David looked away, avoiding Patrick’s eyes, focussing on the nondescript wallpaper opposite.

“Can we go inside? I can go back to the motel after but I think we should talk and it’s not a conversation for a hallway.”

Patrick’s stomach disappeared. This was it then. David was minutes away from shattering his heart.

Slowly, Patrick stood, muscles shaking and acid burning through him as he watched David rise as well, moving away from the door.

It was like watching from a distance, outside his own body.

Someone else unlocked the door with quivering hands. Someone else turned the handle and stepped back to let David walk in ahead of him. Someone else closed the door behind them, sealing them inside together for maybe the final time.

Patrick slowly set his keys down on the table just inside the door, carefully hung David’s jacket on the coat stand, adjusting it just so, smoothing his hand down the sleeve. He took his time over these little tasks, dragging out the time before David might speak the words that ended it. If these were his final minutes as David Rose’s boyfriend, he wanted them to last as long as possible.

He’d fight it, he decided. If there was a chance that David would change his mind Patrick would fight and plead for him to reconsider. He’d get on his knees and beg if it meant David would give him another chance, an opportunity to take back all of the accusations and insults Patrick had thrown at him earlier that night. He didn’t care if it looked undignified. He wanted David more than he wanted his dignity.

Finally he turned to David, hovering by the arm of the sofa.

At a loss for what to do, Patrick reached a hand into his pocket, pulling out David’s phone.

“You left this. I took it in case you called.” He walked across the room to place the phone in David’s outstretched hand. It felt like wading through deep water, his legs were so heavy with fear.

“Thanks,” David said quietly, and slid the cell into his pocket without taking his eyes off Patrick.

Silence fell as Patrick traced the lines of his boyfriend’s face with his eyes, memorising what was already indelibly burned into his mind.

David’s eyes darted around, settling on Patrick before shooting away. “I-”

“I was out looking for you,” Patrick said, feeling this was important for David to know. He wanted David to know that he put the effort in to search for him, eager for any points this would score him. “I went to Stevie’s and the store and the motel and drove around searching. I wanted you to be safe.”

David gave a tiny smile, somehow devoid of happiness. “I couldn’t face any of those places. I just walked around. And then Jocelyn found me.”

“Jocelyn?” Patrick asked, taken aback. The house of the mayor and his wife was the last place he’d have through to look.

“Mmm.” David said. “She pulled over and offered a lift, said it was too cold to be out.” He pulled the cuffs of his sweater over his hands, playing with the hems as he explained. “She didn’t ask me anything, she seemed to understand I needed the space. I just sat on the couch for hours, thinking, while she kept Roland away.”

Thank God for Jocelyn, Patrick thought. Dealing with Roland was difficult at the best of times, downright impossible when emotional or upset.

Patrick didn’t want to ask the next question, but knew it was necessary. “Thinking about us?”

David nodded and Patrick held his breath. “I love you,” David said in a rush and flames licked at Patrick’s heart as he sagged, relieved at David’s use of the present tense. “I know we both said some things tonight but I hope you know how I feel about you.”

“I do and I love you too, David,” Patrick said. “We clearly need to talk but I really love you.”

David threw his head back, blinking at the ceiling and crossed his arms over his chest.

“I want to be with you. I just… I don’t know where that all came from tonight.” David breathed in shakily and Patrick could see him fighting back tears and Patrick’s body ached with how much he wanted to hold David. He didn’t know how welcome it would be so he held back, fists clenching to ward off the itch in his fingers.

“David, I’m so sorry. I didn’t want to hurt you and I know I did,” Patrick said quietly. “I didn’t think what I was saying, I couldn’t stop the words coming out.”

David laughed, but it was a horrible, joyless version of his usual laugh and it turned Patrick’s stomach. “I think we’re both guilty of that.” He closed his eyes, breathing deeply. “Can we sit?”

Patrick nodded and they sat down, mindful of keeping a careful distance so they didn’t accidentally touch. Patrick hated it. Every centimetre between himself and David was painful.

“I know you were annoyed by how I reacted about the store,” David blurted out. “I’m sorry if you thought I didn’t respect your opinion.”

He paused and Patrick waited, biting down on his words, sensing from the tense lines of David’s body that it was important to let David talk.

“It’s… It turns out my galleries weren’t all that successful.”

Well, he wasn’t expecting _that. _

Patrick’s eyebrows rose in surprise and he couldn’t help speaking. “What? I saw the numbers, David. You were doing great.”

David gave his head a shake. “Mmm. No. My parents basically bought everything for me. I have no idea if I could have made it on my own.” He took a shuddering breath, visibly steadying himself.

“I’m a fraud,” David whispered and every cell in Patrick’s body longed to comfort him, to wrap him safe in his arms and never let go.

“All my business decisions back then? I don’t know if they were the right ones because my parents threw money at my problems without me knowing.” David started bouncing his knee and Patrick watched the jostling movement, unsure if a steadying hand would be well-received and too frightened to risk it in case David flinched away from his touch.

“So, I… I think I’m avoiding making decisions now in case they’re wrong and I’ll know for sure that my instincts back then were wrong too.” He was carefully looking everywhere but at Patrick. “But you come along and you’re so sure and want to take action and I trust you but also… why didn’t I think of it?”

Patrick’s heart twisted and he braved the distance, stretching out his hand to settle on David’s leg, stilling the rapid jolting. To his relief David didn’t throw him off or move away, but seemed to relax, tension draining out of him.

“Your instincts are right, David,” Patrick said softly. David huffed disbelievingly and Patrick insisted, “They _are._ I don’t know what happened with the galleries but all the money in the world wouldn’t have saved them if every choice you made was the wrong one.” Tears spilled over onto David’s cheeks and Patrick’s fingers squeezed his leg, comforting.

“I don’t want to mess the store up, Patrick,” David said desperately. “It’s not just myself I’d be letting down. I’ve let so many people down. I don’t want to disappoint you as well.”

At that, Patrick squeezed his eyes closed to ward off the sob that threatened to burst forth. If he ever got his hands on the people who made David Rose feel less than perfect...

And yes, right now that category included himself but he hoped he would get the chance to spend the rest of his life letting David know how cherished he was until there was no more room for doubt.

“David, you’re not a disappointment. You’re everything, the best thing in my life. I wake up every morning and I can’t wait to see you. I love you more than anything.”

David was crying silently, eyes fixed on Patrick’s hand on his leg.

Gently, Patrick pressed on. “And as far as the store goes: you’re the genius who finds all these unique products for our store, you set everything up, your creative vision and business plan was what drew me to invest.”

Yes, he also thought David was scorching hot, but Patrick wouldn’t have thrown away his life savings on a business he didn’t think was going to work just because he had a crush on the owner.

David gave a broken sob as Patrick continued, “I think it’s a good thing about having a business partner- we can both come up with ideas. You don’t need to feel bad for not coming up with everything. Just like I don’t feel bad for still not being clear what body milk is.”

David choked out a laugh then, less strained than before and Patrick felt more at ease. It was looking more likely that this would end without David walking out the door.

“I do think the grotto idea could be good,” David capitulated quietly. “We’d need elegant wooden signs, not plastic. We could transform the back office one night. Maybe offer mulled wine and hot chocolate.”

Patrick exhaled, his fingers tightening on David’s leg, pleased David was thinking about it and adding his own ideas to the mix. “It’s something to think about. You might be right, the dip in takings could be a fluke but even if it is, a themed event could draw extra revenue.”

David nodded and shifted, eyes closing. His leg twitched under Patrick’s palm. “And the other stuff?”

“The other stuff,” Patrick repeated. “Yes.”

There was a tense pause as they both collected themselves, neither willing to interrupt the delicate truce but knowing the need to clear the air was too pressing to ignore.

Patrick inhaled deeply, bracing himself to tackle the first of the herd of elephants in the room.

“You do know the Ken thing was nothing, don’t you?” He asked, and David bowed his head.

“I think... yes, I know you wouldn’t have called him but,” David shrugged diffidently. “My mind latches onto things sometimes. Goes straight for the worst-case scenario and won’t let go.”

Patrick shifted, turning himself on the sofa to more fully face David. “Please believe me, I was only teasing when I kept it. If I had known it upset you so much, I’d have torn it up on the spot. I’d have run after him to tell him I had a boyfriend and wasn’t interested in him.”

Patrick leaned forward, letting David hear the conviction in his tone as he added, “I need you to hear this. I don’t want Ken. Or Ted. I don’t want anyone else.”

David bit his lip. He opened his mouth, hesitated before saying, “You say that now, but I’m a lot and there are so many guys who are less difficult. You might wake up one day and want to be in a relationship with someone who doesn’t mind if-” he broke off, scrabbling for an example. “If the knives are put on the left of the forks in the drawer and doesn’t take so long to get ready in the morning. Or someone who can go away for the weekend without at least two huge suitcases. I’m too much for a lot of people.”

Patrick shook his head, vehemently. “You aren’t too much for me. I love you and I want you. I don’t care what any of your exes said. They were wrong. And I’m so lucky that they were such huge idiots.”

David twisted his head, teary eyes finally meeting Patrick’s, who held them with a steady gaze. _Believe me._

“It isn’t hard to be with you, David.”

David stared at him for a long moment, breath unsteady and Patrick could see the moment he accepted Patrick’s word.

One hand came to rest upon Patrick’s on his leg and Patrick turned his hand over, interlacing his fingers with David’s, sighing at the skin to skin contact. Something deep inside him eased at the feeling of David’s warmth and small shockwaves travelled up his arms from the nerve endings in contact with David’s hand.

He looked down at David’s hand in his own, heart filling and overflowing with the simple pleasure of this, of them.

“I wasn’t trying to push you towards Ken,” David said suddenly. “I hated myself the moment I said it. I don’t… what you said before. I don’t want that. I don’t want either of us to sleep with other people. After you said it, I kept thinking about you with-” He shook his head. “I don’t want that for us.”

Patrick’s heart had risen into his throat and he swallowed against the sudden tight blockage. “No one else,” he agreed.

David smiled softly, slowly, a small light entering his eyes and Patrick offered a tentative one of his own. They were going okay.

“You know,” Patrick said. “I can try to be more spontaneous. I still don’t think scrambling through trees is the way to go but we can do other things…”

David was already shaking his head. “That really was more about a weird competitive thing with Alexis. I don’t think our relationship is boring, Patrick.”

“But in the store when I won’t even kiss you-” Patrick said, needing to explain this, needing David to understand the urgent desire always thrumming just beneath Patrick’s skin.

“I don’t need-”

“I know it isn’t sex you’re after at work, I know. But,” Patrick paused, weighing up the embarrassment of what he was about to admit versus his need to make David understand. “The thing is, if I don’t put those boundaries up at work, I’m afraid I’ll get too carried away.”

David stared at him and Patrick flushed.

“I’ve never felt like this. Never been turned on this easily. You barely have to do anything and I get so hard, so desperate for you I can’t think of anything else. It’s not that I don’t want to kiss you and touch you, believe me it’s not. I just think if I do, I’ll be worse than useless the rest of the day.”

David lifted an eyebrow, a sly smile playing about his lips and Patrick battled on. “But, maybe, after hours, we could… lift the ban on fooling around in the storeroom.”

His breath quickened just at the thought. The things David had done to him in that storeroom…

If it hadn’t been such an emotionally exhausting day, his cock would definitely have responded to visceral tug in his gut.

How had he had the nerve to suggest David was the horny one?

David’s deep voice broke through his thoughts. “Yeah, that sounds-” his voice cracked and he swallowed. “That sounds good.”

Maybe they were both the horny ones.

When he looked back at David, he was watching him with fond eyes. He leaned forward but hesitated and Patrick knew him well enough to know he was second guessing himself. He brought his free hand up to David’s face, curling his fingers around the back of David’s neck as he closed the distance between them, kissing his boyfriend (_still his boyfriend, thank God_) softly, a gentle press of lips.

David sighed against his lips and Patrick collected the sound greedily, hoarding it in his mind, filing it away in the special folder entitled ‘Noises David Makes.’

Patrick shook when David stroked his tongue through his mouth, drawing back again to soft nips and kisses.

David was here. David was here and he was staying and it was going to be okay.

Soon kisses devolved into nuzzling, nuzzling into cuddling and they sat side by side on the sofa enjoying the closeness as their bodies pressed against each other.

Tiredness suddenly hit Patrick in a wave, sapping his strength, the stress of the evening finally giving way to allow basic bodily needs to reassert themselves. Sleep nudged at him and he stifled a yawn but not well enough. David lifted his head from Patrick’s shoulder and Patrick could see exhaustion reflected back at him.

Residual uncertainty had David asking, “Do you want me to stay?”

“Yes,” Patrick said firmly. “Stay.”

It was past two in the morning by the time they had pulled on their pajamas and collapsed into bed, side by side. Patrick curled himself around David’s back, pulling his boyfriend close to him with an arm around his waist, sighing into the soft skin of his neck as they finally fell to sleep.

It was still dark when Patrick woke, shivering, unable to pinpoint how much time had passed.

He squinted at the clock on the bedside table. 4.17am.

Patrick sighed and turned over, reaching out for David before realising he was alone in bed and his heart stuttered, suddenly wide awake.

Had he dreamed David coming back to him?

A shuffling, scraping sound towards the foot of the bed drew him bolt upright and his hand shot out to the bedside lamp, tugging the cord and bathing the room in soft light. Patrick scrunched his eyes up, trying to abate the pain of the light hitting his retinas while searching for the source of the noise.

David, startled, looked up from where he crouched by the chest at the foot of the bed. Pale with sleep, his heavy eyes blinked in the glow of the lamp. “Sorry,” he croaked. “Did I wake you?”

Patrick breathed a sigh of relief. Not a dream. David was here with him.

“It’s okay. What are you doing?” Patrick asked, straightening in bed as he tried to see over the footboard.

“Looking for another blanket. It’s cold,” David said and now that he mentioned it, Patrick could feel the chill in the air, hairs raising on his arms.

A draught brushed over his skin and he glanced towards the window, keen eyes spotting the fluttering of the curtains. Shivering, Patrick climbed out of bed and stumbled to the window, reaching through the curtains to pull the window closed and block out the winter air.

When he turned around David stood by the side of the bed, cradling a folded blanket in his arms.

Patrick took it out of his hands and nodded to the bed. “I’ll cover you up.”

He waited while David settled into Patrick’s bed, drawing the duvet over himself before Patrick spread the additional blanket over the bed, enjoying the sight of his adorable, sleep-muddled boyfriend drawing the covers up to his chin.

Trembling slightly from the cold, Patrick rounded the bed and climbed in his side, taking the time to smooth the duvet and blanket back down before switching the lamp off and lying back, sighing as the warmth of the bed surrounded him once more.

Immediately David snuggled into him, snuffly and sleepy and kissed Patrick’s collarbone. He murmured happily when Patrick wrapped his arm around him and pressed a kiss into his hair, breathing the scent of David’s cardamom and sandalwood shampoo deep into his lungs.

Patrick felt David smile against his chest and closed his eyes when David sighed in contentment.

“I love being here with you.” In the quiet room, Patrick still barely heard David’s whisper.

“Me too,” Patrick said. “I love you.”

David nuzzled his face into Patrick’s chest. “‘s cold.”

Patrick tightened his hold on David, who shuffled closer and pushed a hand underneath Patrick’s shirt, seeking out heat. He pressed his cold palm against Patrick’s stomach. Patrick felt the muscles twitch in response to David’s touch.

David moaned. “You’re so warm.” His cold nose brushed along Patrick’s collarbone and Patrick shivered.

Underneath the blanket he brought his hand to rest on David’s beneath his shirt, curling his fingers around David’s hand, rubbing and squeezing, trying to pass on some heat.

David lifted his leg to drape it over Patrick’s, curling into Patrick’s side as he used him for his own personal hot water bottle. Not that Patrick minded in the slightest.

David’s leg rubbed along Patrick’s and Patrick’s breath hitched as his cock stirred in interest.

David shifted, groaning long and low as he soaked up Patrick’s heat and Patrick clenched his eyes closed, breathing deeply, willing his body to calm itself.

It was very early, they’d had a long night, they needed to sleep. They were staying together, there would be other times for this. They didn’t need to have sex right now. He should let David rest. His mind repeated the list, trying to convince his dick to listen.

Patrick lay perfectly still, letting David wrap himself around him, unable to stop himself responding as David draped his gorgeous body across Patrick. Patrick hadn’t been kidding when he said no one could turn him on so easily as David. A couple of kisses and David snuggling up against him and he was already getting hard.

The hand on his stomach started rubbing across his skin and David made a satisfied noise deep in his throat. Patrick’s blood rushed to his cock and he inhaled shakily. The noises David could make...

If he just lay still until David drifted off, he could sneak off to the bathroom to take care of himself or (which was more likely, as he wasn’t sure he could tear himself from David’s side) wait until his erection abated by itself.

David adjusted his leg and his thigh brushed against Patrick’s hard cock.

David froze. There was a moment where no one moved and then David shifted again, raising his thigh deliberately and letting it nudge Patrick’s dick through his pants.

Patrick bit back a groan as David drew closer, closing the last little distance between his groin and Patrick’s leg, letting Patrick feel the effect their closeness was starting to have on David as well.

“You feel good, Patrick,” David said and the nose along his collarbone turned into his lips, peppering tiny kisses along the skin. “I love you so much.”

Patrick sighed as David licked his skin.

David’s thigh pressed against him again and Patrick shuddered. The previous night had been stressful and difficult and Patrick thought he should be far too exhausted for this but he couldn’t help wanting it.

Even after clearing the air and the benefit of a couple of hours sleep diminishing the events of the evening, Patrick couldn’t forget the fear he’d felt when the thought had struck him that they might be over. The need to reassure himself of the presence of the man beside him in bed was overwhelming.

David could have decided that Patrick and his careless words were not worth it and walked away. But he hadn’t. They were here, and they were together and Patrick wanted so badly to touch him.

“Is this... do you want...?” David murmured into his neck and rocked his hips into Patrick’s side, slowly.

“Yeah. Yeah, I want to. Let me just...” Patrick turned on his side, pulling the leg from around his and dragging David’s knee up to rest over his waist as he pressed himself to David’s front.

In the dim light from the streetlight creeping through the gap in the curtains, Patrick found David’s mouth, kissing him as David crowded himself closer.

Patrick felt David’s dick press against his own and groaned into David’s mouth as pleasure jolted his body. David undulated his hips, licking into Patrick’s mouth and Patrick snaked a hand down David’s back, burrowing under the waistband of his trousers to rest on his ass.

Patrick’s hand smoothed over the firm muscle and squeezed gently. _God,_ Patrick loved David’s ass. He loved watching it from across the room, expensive pants drawing tight across it as David leaned forward to straighten something on a shelf, loved palming it as he pushed his cock into David, or gripping onto it as David slammed into Patrick’s prostate but that frantic fucking was for another night. He wanted something else tonight and that was fine- they had time.

David pulled away from Patrick’s lips with a soft curse as he pushed his hips into Patrick’s and Patrick hissed at the friction on his cock.

“God, David, you’re so sexy. I want... I want to feel you against me. I need it.” He was already vibrating with desire, on edge and wound up with the memories of previous night’s emotions.

“Sssh. I know. Me too.” David shifted and his hands moved under the covers to try and wrestle Patrick’s pants down his hips. After a couple of seconds of shuffling Patrick got the idea and lifted his hip up, allowing the fabric to slide down and release his cock. David abandoned Patrick’s pants mid-thigh and shoved his own waistband down just enough to free himself.

Patrick bent his head forward for another kiss and sighed as their dicks finally touched, skin to skin.

Patrick rocked forward, moaning into David’s open mouth as every inch of David’s thick cock rubbed against his own.

Patrick pulled away with a grunt when David thrust forward into him, using his leg to pull Patrick’s pelvis forward at the same time.

“God, David you’re perfect. Love you so much.”

David’s head turned to the side and Patrick mourned the closeness of his lips until he spotted David’s hand emerge from under the duvet, rising up to David’s mouth where he licked across his palm.

“Oh yes. Your hand. Please, baby,” Patrick panted and David pushed his hand beneath the covers once more.

David licked his lips as his hand burrowed down. “Have to get my hand on your gorgeous cock. Love it so much.”

Patrick groaned at the touch of David’s hand on his dick, pushing forward into his grip eagerly, whispering words of praise and delight.

David started up a steady, stroking rhythm, trying to wrap his fingers around them both.

David’s length pressed, hot and hard, against his own and Patrick needed to get his hand on it. He snaked his own hand down, grunting his appreciation when his fingers finally skimmed David’s solid cock, spreading the leaking fluid down as he wrapped his fingers around his boyfriend.

David moaned as Patrick stroked him firmly and his hips shunted forwards, pressing himself tighter against Patrick.

“Yeah, just like that. Love your hand on me, Patrick. Feels so good.”

Patrick leaned forward to kiss David again as they found their rhythm together, taking comfort in the solace of having one another close.

It was an awkward angle and there wasn’t a lot of space but neither were inclined to take their hand away and they stroked and pumped firmly, panting into each other’s mouths.

This wasn’t going to last long.

David tightened his grip around them and swiped his thumb over the head of Patrick’s dick and oh _fuck_ that was good. Patrick’s hips jerked and he desperately worked his fist on his boyfriend, eager to get him there as well. He wanted to make David come, make him so happy, make sure he was as certain as Patrick in his belief that this was worth keeping forever.

Their mouths rested together, more sharing breath than actually kissing at this point, half muttered declarations of love falling between panting lips.

Patrick felt his release crest and he moaned. David deftly moved his hand to cover the head of his dick, catching Patrick’s come in his palm. Waves of pleasure washed over Patrick’s frame as his cock emptied and his fingers faltered on David’s dick.

David grunted and his come-covered hand seized Patrick’s, curling around the back of his hand and squeezing, causing Patrick to tighten his own grip on David’s hard length. Holding Patrick’s hand, David encouraged Patrick’s fingers on him, pumping quickly until he came with a low moan, letting go of Patrick’s hand at the last moment to catch his own release in his hand.

Patrick watched, awestruck as David’s face contorted with ecstasy and his eyes clenched closed while he rode through his orgasm. Finally his face relaxed and he slumped back against the pillow, a sleepy, dazed smile on his face.

Patrick couldn’t resist the urge to cover that smile with his lips, breathing in deeply as his senses were filled with all things _David._

David laughed lightly against his mouth, a giddy, breathy sound and Patrick grinned dopily at him when David gingerly produced his come-smeared hand, careful to avoid wiping it on the duvet. Patrick pulled his own, only slightly less dirty, hand out and flopped onto his back, instantly feeling the loss of David’s warmth.

From his prone position, it was easier to reach out and retrieve the wipes from his bedside drawer, returning quickly to David to clean up.

After wiping off and pulling their pants up, Patrick pulled David towards him again, both relaxed and muzzy with satisfaction and re-emerging tiredness. Sighing, Patrick focused on David’s steady breathing gently ruffling his sleep shirt, lulled by the proof of his presence.

They fell back asleep while it was still dark outside, falling snow casting shadows in the dim light of the streetlamp through the curtains.

When Patrick awoke the next morning, he was once more by himself in bed and for a moment doubt crept in before he noticed the crumpled covers, the sated, heavy feeling in his limbs and the sound of a shower running.

He beamed at the ceiling and sighed happily.

David came back to him last night. They’d talked and sorted things out and capped it off with fantastic early morning sex.

After all that David had admitted and agreed to compromise on last night, the least Patrick could do was make sure he was well fed. There was that chocolate chip pancake mix in the cupboard that David would love and if Patrick got up straight away, it could be ready by the time David got out of the shower.

And maybe after David had eaten and he was full and happy, Patrick could treat him to a lazy blow job.

Hm. Except they didn’t have time for Patrick to take David apart as thoroughly as he wanted. Maybe the blow job could wait until the stockroom after work now that Patrick had stopped cock-blocking himself and lifted the ban. Yes, that was a better idea.

Patrick hauled himself out of bed and padded through the apartment towards the kitchen, noticing as he did that the heat was back on and the room was warm and cosy.

Grabbing the pancake mix from the cupboard, Patrick turned and stopped still, chest full to bursting as his eyes fell on the kettle and the reassembled mug to its left. A piece of kitchen roll sat underneath the mug to protect the counter and a tube of superglue lay beside it.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! Hope you enjoyed.


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